Happy New Year everyone! As the Second vow received so many thought provoking comments, I am encouraged to continue with the Third vow. This, on the face of it, is ' Do not get intoxicated', but as usual there is more to explore here.
What does 'intoxicate' mean? The dictionary has a number of definitions:
1.To stupefy or excite by the action of a chemical substance such as alcohol.
2. To stimulate or excite: "a man whom life intoxicates, has no need of wine" (Anaïs Nin).
3. To poison.
What can intoxicate us? Certainly drink and drugs can, but are there other intoxicants? If you take the broader sense of the word as meaning something that stimulates and excites us to the point where we no longer act rationally and may thereby develop an addiction, we may add such less recognised intoxicants as gambling and pornography. When one falls in love one can often appear intoxicated. When we fall in love and that love is not reciprocated fully we may become obsessed by our beloved and find that we do not act rationally. For these reasons I like to think of this vow as concerning anything we do which takes us over and means we, in a sense, lose our mind.
We have discussed the effects of drink on Dao before. I will add a saying which stuck in my mind when I first read it:
First you take a drink,
Then the drink takes a drink,
Then the drink takes you!
But why is it important in Buddhism not to get intoxicated? It is because the goal of buddhism is to discover true happiness by accepting life as it is. If you use drink not for its social and medical benefits but as a means of escaping from life's problems then this prevents your acceptance of life in all its manifold aspects.
Also Buddhists follow a moral code of compassion and the prevention of suffering. And we all know that one can be very hurtful when one is drunk. One can say things which often can never be retracted or undone. One can even kill, through violence or reckless driving.
Are there occasions when you think drinking etc is acceptable? If so where do you draw the line? What is a fun night out and when might it become damaging or hurtful?
What do you think of the culture today in which binge drinking is acceptable?
Over to you guys.
3 comments:
Hello all. I hope you all had a lovely Christmas. It was lovely to see Swan and all her cygnets in England. A happy, healthy and prosperous New Year to all of you and I hope you dont become too intoxicated tonight! Which funnily enough brings us to the latest vow!
For myself, I used to use drink to give me confidence. Nowadays I am happy with a few glasses of wine and if I have too much I feel ill for days after, but perhaps I am just showing my age.
You all know from previous posts the problems I have with my partner's drinking which makes me feel as if I want to drink less.
There have been times when I have felt intoxicated with the joy of life which I think is a good thing. So when does intoxication become a bad thing? Is it when you become obsessed with something or someone to the point of doing harm to others. I have also been guilty of this in the past.
So as a vow I think this makes sense if it helps us avoid taking pleasurable things too far.
I find this vow a little restrictive.
Drink, drugs and any other substances used in large quantities or in the wrong situations can be dangerous for mind, body and spirit, but I do think that there are a lot of people, like myself, who really enjoy a drink sometimes for many reasons.
Since having moved to France, I have got into the habit of drinking a glass of red wine per day - my Doctor also told me recently, that a glass of red wine per day is very good for health reasons.
I also do enjoy that heady feeling of having had 2-3 glasses of wine when with friends having dinner (or at lovely occasions such as at Bruv's house at Christmas). Also like Namaste, it does help sometimes by giving me a bit of dutch courage in the right situations.
I have also felt that intoxication (obsession) with someone in the past who I fell unhealthily in love (lust) with. That was a horrible time, and will never be repeated and I have Bruv and Namaste to thank for getting me out of that one.
Binge drinking is something completely different, I knew two women who were binge drinkers i.e. they went out once per month and drank so much they could not stand up. This, for me was pure escapism, and for me it was a cry for help, but it is difficult to help someone when they follow this pattern, as they do not drink everyday - just once in a while to really forget who they are and the life they lead - to really become someone else for one night they were also very embarrassed after each occasion.
I do feel that binge drinking has in the UK, has become more commonplace as people wrestle with their stressful lives. And in particular, I feel that it has affected women more as they try to find their places in society - trying to be mothers, career women, home workers all rolled into one, or staying at home because it is the done thing, to find that they have lost themselves somewhere along the way.
For younger people, perhaps it is also a case of trying to find a new identity - there is so much pressure on young people now, to look good, be successful, work hard, play hard and finance the whole thing without going off the rails - most people when they leave college or university now have debts to pay back of 20-25,000 - not a good way to start life in adulthood.
Perhaps then, all this said, drinking and taking drugs is not the answer, and facing reality is - but for some its just too frightening!
I personally still believe very much in the expression that a little of what you fancy is a good thing and I will carry on having my glass of wine each day.
By the way, a very Happy New Year to you all.
With love Swan
Dear Swan,
I agree with much of what you say. You will see from my original post that I was talking about indulging beyond the normal medical and social benefit level.
It is worth remembering that Buddhism is known as the Middle Way, ie do not deprive yourself but do not do things to excess; the old Victorian approach of moderation in all things is a good saying to live by.
You make a strong case for the pressures on women but in fairness I must speak up for the boys, I know they have had the upper hand for centuries but the new freedoms that women now have seem to have left most men confused as to what their role is and consequently leaves them totally stressed out too. You only need to look at UK TV advertising to see that men are invariably portrayed these days as bumbling brain-dead oafs. If women were shown in this way now there would be an enormous outcry. The downtrodden stereotype is on the other foot.
This vow is not about stopping you having a few glasses of wine but about thinking of the consequences when things get out of hand. And unfortunately you only have to look at the new UK drinking and gambling laws to see whose side the government is on - and it is not Buddha's!
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